Book Link: A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy
What I’m Reading Next: The Millionaire Next Door: The Surprising Secrets of America’s Wealthy

TL;DR Really good book for those interested in exploring the concepts of stoicism and the application of these concepts in every day life.

This book clarified Marcus Aurelius in meditations, especially on Stoics’ perspectives on joy, providing a fresh viewpoint on ancient wisdom. My previous knowledge of Stoicism was limited to contextual clues derived from other readings. I understood individuals described as stoic to be emotionless and robotic. This framing was reinforced last NFL season as Jalen Hurts’ Stoic personality was brought into question.

In my very limited reading of Stoic philosophy I have learned that Stoicism is very nuanced and much more thoughtful than being emotionless. Stoicism advocates for managing negative emotions to maintain peace of mind. By practicing these techniques one can hope to become a Stoic sage who doesn’t have to learn how to manage negative emotions because negative emotions don’t exist in their world.

William Irvine’s book seeks to dispel that myth that Stoics don’t experience joy and to demonstrate how Stoicism is not the absence of emotion. Instead, Irvine seeks to show readers how through the use of Stoic techniques and principles they can lead a life that is centered around a positive emotion such as joy.

Practical Stoic Techniques

The following techniques resonated with me, shaping my philosophy for Life.

• Negative Visualization: This is the practice of imagining what your life would be like if it were in a worse state. For example, imagine you’re walking from point A to point B and are angry that you didn’t instead take a cab. Instead of dwelling on the decision not to take a cab, appreciate your ability to walk. By employing this method of negative visualization you can transform the negative experience of walking a long a distance to a positive experience of being able to walk a long distance.
  
  This practice deeply resonated with me, especially since I tend to react strongly when overwhelmed. When this happens, I tend to become very sharp with my words which usually hurts whoever I’m interacting with at the time and does nothing to quell my frustration. My anxiety will then lead to me thinking about and replaying the interaction in my head. You can see how my being overwhelmed can quickly snowball into me feeling anxious and miserable. With the help of Negative Visualization I have a tool (sometimes used more successfully than others) to cut the process off at the beginning.
  
  Now, when I start to get overwhelmed now I try to take a deep breath and think about how my life would be much worse if whatever is frustrating me was different. For example, When I get frustrated at work I think to myself: What if I didn’t have a job? When I get frustrated when walking Walter I think to myself: What if Walter passed away? When Dana and I get into a riff (usually because I forgot rule #1 of not being a bitch) I think to myself: What if Dana wasn’t in my life.
  
  In asking myself these questions and really trying to visualize a life without it can turn a frustrating situation into a joyful situation. Instead of being frustrated at work I’m thankful that I am employed in a field that I excel at and enjoy. Instead of being frustrated at Walter I’m thankful for the walk that he and I are fortunate enough to enjoy. Instead of being frustrated with Dana I’m thankful that we found one another.
  
• The Trichotomy of Control: Stoicism focuses on the dichotomy of control (things we can control and things we cannot control). Irvine suggests a third span of control (those things we have some control but not complete control over). The example used is winning a competitive event. You can control how prepared you are for the competition and how well you perform in relation to your overall ability. You do not have control over the outcome of the race. Someone may have greater ability, environmental issues may disrupt your ability to compete, or you may experience an injury. All these things are beyond your control. The competitive event would therefore fall into this third bucket of things you have some control over.
  
  This resonates with me because one of the internal challenges I have with regard to stoicism is the somewhat fatalistic approach to it. Stoics, based on my current understanding (admittedly limited), is that they “accept” their lot in life. Epictetus was famously born into Slavery yet still managed to live a virtuous life. The overarching point is that you can’t control external circumstances. You can only control internal thoughts and emotions.
  
  When I first read about this dichotomy I had an allergic reaction. Initially, accepting my circumstances without considering if they could improve seemed unreasonable I can wrap my head around the idea that both Marcus (Roman Emperor) and Epictetus (slave) both objectively lived a “good” life. However, I sometimes struggle to wrap my head around the idea that both these individuals faced similar or equivalent challenges. Epictetus, in enduring slavery, would have had to reason his way to a “good” life in ways that Marcus couldn’t have imagined.
  
  It’s for this reason that I like Irvine’s introduction of a third category. Things over which we have some control. I accept the notion that things will happen to you in life that you have no control over but I reject the idea that one should accept their place in the world as definitive. Improving oneself is essential, though its definition varies by individual, experience, and priorities. Throughout this journey things will happen to you over which you have no control. These things, if you let them, can disrupt your peace of mind. Rather than let them upset us we should recognize them for what they are. Something that is beyond our control. Instead, we should focus on the things we can control such as how we respond.
  
• Goal Internalization: Goal internalization, as described by Irvine, is the practice of framing your goals so that they are completely within your control. This kind of goes hand in hand with the trichotomy of control. The example used that resonated for me was an individual who wanted to win a tennis tournament. Rather then set the goal of winning the tennis tournament, which can be impacted by external factors that are beyond your control, one should set the goal of being prepared to play at their highest competitive level. If the tennis players play results in winning a championship great but that wasn’t the goal. The goal was to be prepared to play a their highest competitive level which they may or may not have achieved.

Challenging Stoic Techniques

• Voluntary Discomfort: Doing things to purposefully introduce discomfort into ones life. While I can appreciate the idea of this I don’t like the idea of voluntary doing things to introduce discomfort into your life. We should use negative reinforcement to prepare ourselves to deal with discomfort but shouldn’t go out of our way to seek it.
  
• Reflective Meditation: As someone with social anxiety, this is something I already do. I think about most of my social interactions before and after they happen and honestly, it can be exhausting. I subscribe more to the Buddhist approach to meditation where one spends dedicated time emptying their mind and living in the present.
  
• Stoic Fellowship: I’m a deeply personal person and think that our purpose here on this earth is individualistic. It’s up to us to define. At the end of the day, on our death bead, it will just be the you, the individual. While I appreciate fellowship and camaraderie I don’t view it as a requirement to achieve peace of mind.

Conclusion

The book not only contextualized Marcus Aurelius’s ideas for me but also inspired me to develop my own philosophy for life.

Irvine references quiet a few other Stoics who’s readings I’ll explore in the future. A Guide to the Good Life is an accessible overview of the application of stoic concepts in one’s life. I’d recommend it for anyone who is interested in Stoicism or, more generally, Philosophy.